GA Season 4 Fanfic by Monali
by MonaGirl
Summary: It's our version of Season 4 where the characters possibly going after S 3 ended. Starts straight after 3.25. Involves all characters. Pairings: MerDer, AI and undecided pairings.


**It's our version of Season 4 where the characters possibly going after S 3 ended. Starts straight after 3.25. Involves all characters. Pairings: MerDer, AI and undecided pairings.Title: GA Season 4 Fanfic by Monali **

Authors: Mona & Ali

Disclaimers: Shonda Rhimes & Crew

Genre: Drama/Romance/General/Angst

Rated: T 

Translation: by Eve155

Summary/Set: starts where Season 3 ended ...

Status: in progress

**4.01 – Salvation**

I can barely remember my past  
Everything seems to disappear so fast   
But I recall being jealous and alone  
Gazing at the dreams going by

I started my life when you knocked on the door  
Found something inside I didn't dare to ignore  
Now I do believe in flowers on the moon  
I'll swim beside the golden tide

You crashed by the gate  
Captured my fate  
Salvation  
My eyes couldn't see  
I hardly breathed  
I was diving so deep  
Salvation 

I'm down in the study holding on to my luck  
Will you still love me when I call you up?  
I gave you my body, the power over me  
Come on, bring out the best in me

You crashed by the gate  
Captured my fate  
Salvation  
My eyes couldn't see  
I hardly breathed  
My heart was asleep  
Salvation  
Some will get broken  
Others will get lucky like me meeting you  
Don't pass me by

You crashed by the gate  
Captured my fate   
Salvation  
My eyes couldn't see  
I hardly breathed  
I was down on my knees  
Salvation  
Some will get broken  
Others will get lucky like me meeting you  
Don't pass me by  
Don't pass me by

I found salvation, oh yea  
You bring me salvation  
I found salvation

_As a surgeon you learn the ability to help your patients (Derek is sitting in his trailer, preparing for work) but the patients also need to be receptive for your help (Meredith is lying next to Christina with her eyes open). You can't force them (you see Christina with tears in her eyes). If you force them, you will loose them (Burke at the hotel) because the trust, which has to prevail between a patient and his doctor, will get lost (Callie watches George sleeping). And if you once lost them, they mostly do not retire (Alex is sitting at the breakfast table starring in his cup of granola)._

**At the apartment of Cristina:**

Meredith didn't sleep a wink during last night. Too much has happened yesterday. Everything started with Dereks revelation of him meeting another woman, then his speech in the dressing-room and if this wasn't enough, the burst weeding of Cristina could pin the golden conclusion under another bad day in her live. She turned her head to the sight and watched her best friend, who was lying with the back next to her. She knew, that Cristina had been crying all night-long, even if she always denied it in a choked voice. She looked at her watch to see what time it was because she quickly had to change her dress before she could go to work.

"Cristina?"

"I'm fine." Meredith rolled eyes because the voice of her friend articulately revealed that this was not true.

"Of course you are. I got to go. Can I leave you alone?" She watched how Crristina slowly turned on her back, starring towards the ceiling with bloodshot eyes. "Cris."

"I'm fine." Her voice sounded hoarsely and her clearly undertone, which there always was in her voice, was gone.

"You are talking to me. You are not fine."

"Meredith, stop it. He is gone and I'm free." She snorted: "I guess, Mama forgot to teach him how to behave on a weeding".

"Cris."

"No, I'm fine. He cancelled the weeding and I will move on."

"Cris. Shut up. I know you are not." The two women were looking at each others eyes. "And apart from that, I really need to go home to change my clothes before I go to the hospital." She made a small brake. "Look, I know how you are feeling".

"What?" Cristina interrupted her angered. "You fiancé left you in front of the altar, too?" She snorted again. "Maybe Mama told him to act that way". She shook her head and let herself fall again on her pillow.

"No, my boyfriend just left me because of his wife".

"But he came back". She put her hands up and fluttered in front of Meredith's face.

"And who tells you that Burke will not come back to you?" Cristina opened her eyes and looked towards Meredith.

"And who tells you that I want him back? I'm fine, Meredith". Thus she threw her blanket on the side, leaped her legs over the edge of the bed and went to her living room. Meredith watched her head shaking and also gut up. She slipped into her dress and regarded herself in the mirror. Sighing she too went on her way to the living room where she almost ran into Cristina who was rooted to the spot behind the door. Her eyes were focussed on the wedding dress.

"Why don't you accompany me and when I come home tonight we will get drunk with the alcohol I got in the cupboard?" Feeling she laid a hand on Cristina's shoulder who came around again by the touch.

"I'm fine and I will go to work." She shook of Meredith's hand and continued her way to the bathroom. 

"Bailey will send you home", Meredith shouted but Cristina just shrug her shoulders and closed the door behind her. 

Frustrated Meredith shook her head. With a last eye on the wedding dress she left the apartment of her best friend. She knew very well, that she couldn't stop Cristina because she was at least as stubborn as herself.

**At the house of Meredith:**

Izzie awoke rough from her dream by the sound of her alarm clock. Still half asleep she groped for her bedside table to apply the "Off" button. Sighing she lolled herself in her bed an opened slowly her eyes. The morning sun was shining trough the window and flooded the room with light. How could the sun be so shiny when she felt herself that drained? Groaning she drew the blanket over her head. Memories of yesterday came into her mind. It was supposed to be the happiest day in the lives of Cristina Yang and Preston Burke but it ended in an enormous nightmare. She could only suppose how it was to be left in Front of the altar by the man you love.

Instinctively her thoughts wandered to George. Did she really tell him, that she was in love with him or has everything just been a dream? And what is about Callie? It punctured Izzie when she thought, that George cohabited with Callie and that they were possibly now practicing for a baby. Was she that wrong with him? Didn't he feel the same for her? How could he even consider founding a family with Callie?

And then there was still Meredith. Bravely she came to the fore to tell everyone in the church that the marriage was cancelled. "It's over", she said. Izzie had the bad feeling that Meredith was not only talking about the wedding and the relationship of Cristina and Burke. She saw it on the sad face of Derek. What had happened between him and Meredith?

Izzie leaped her legs over the edge of the bed and got up. She listened. It was quiet, unusually quiet, in the house. The same condition as it was last night. She took a cap to come home because everyone else was suddenly disappeared. Meredith had left the church after her speech without comment. And Alex had already left the church by that time. Dr. Bailey probably assigned him for emergency service. And now it seems that she is still the only one in the house. Izzie slipped into her pink dressing-gown. Even on the corridor it was suspiciously quiet.

"Meredith?", she knocked carefully at the door and entered the room after nobody answered her.

The bed looked unaffected. So she wasn't wrong. Meredith didn't come home yesterday. She probably had spent the night with Derek. Suddenly she heard some noise from the kitchen. She opened the door and grimaced her face to a smile as she entered the room.

"Hey", she greeted as she passed Alex to go to the wash-basin to get a pack of aspirin.

"Hey", He didn't even look at her and preoccupied went on scrambling his cup of granola.

"Do you know where Meredith is?" Izzie took a drink of water to pop the pills down.

Alex shrug shoulders. 

"You two didn't come home together?" Izzie knew by the time she asked how unnecessary that question was. She herself had seen how Alex had left the church before Meredith.

"No", he shortly answered.

"So, she probably had spent the night with Derek", Izzie said, shrugging her shoulders and taking seat on the opposite of Alex.

"Probably."

"Were you assigned for emergency service yesterday? You were gone so fast." Izzie didn't give up. It wasn't typically Alex to be that incommunicative.

He only shortly looked up and attended himself to his granola again.

"Burke left Cristina in Front of the altar." Izzie rolled eyes. "Can you imagine how it feels to be left by the man … I mean the woman you love on your weeding day?"

Alex brushed his granola and got up. "I will move out", he whispered.

"What?", Izzie looked at him with a confused expression. "Why, I mean .. so suddenly? Where do you want to go?" She stottered. "Did I do anything? Are you mad at me?"

Alex slowly shook his head. "I got on your nerves for a long time enough, yours and Meredith's."

Izzie looked at him stunned: "We are friends, Alex … a family … Don't you know? Our toast … we are ruined friends that stick together no matter what happens".

He shook his head. "No longer", he answered laconically.

"What has happened?"

"Nothing". He made a cold gesture. "You can tell O'Malley that he can have his room back".

Izzie's face froze. That was the matter. Alex knew about her and George. That's why he wanted to leave. Her numbness resolved as she saw how Alex took his bag and his jacket. "Alex, wait!"

He had already reached the door and slowly turned towards her. Frowning he looked at her. "Yes?"

"Let me explain." Izzie gesticulated helplessly with her arms. "George and I … I wasn't expecting that. You said that I would recognize when I'm ready for a new relationship. And now I am ready." She stopped helplessly as she saw the confused expression of Alex.

"I love him, Alex" I mean, I guess, I do.", she picked up the thread again. "Sex with him was like …" She stopped again. Why does she tell him that? She doesn't have to account to him for anything. When they were together, he had left her for a "hot date". She didn't need to have a guilty conscience and she didn't have to justify herself for her actions, especially not towards Alex. But nevertheless she felt the necessity to explain why she slept with George.

Alex countenance didn't show what he was thinking. He listened silently.

"We both were drunk", Izzie continued. "And then everything went so fast". She lifted her head and looked at him insistently. "But that will not change our friendship. I don't want you to go!"

Alex carelessly shrug his shoulders. "You don't need me, Iz. Now there is O'Malley ". He put the bag down on the ground and hided his hands in his trouser pocket. "Take a look at the practical side. Your new lover will soon need a place to stay after Callie had thrown him out of the hotel after she has heard about you two." He grimaced his face to an ironic grin. "It will be of your use if I leave". He grabbed his bag again and opened the door. "Everyone gets what he deserves", he mumbled before he left the house conclusively. 

Izzie leaned against the front door and closed her eyes. Denny died, George had chosen Callie and now Alex moved out. She never felt that lonely and deserted. She wrapped her arms around her shaking body and her eyes filled with tears.

**In the suite of George and Callie:**

"Come on Callie, I'm late …. I need to get up". Laughing and by gently force George pushed away his wife as she again started clearing her way from his earlobe, through his neck to his navel. "Stop it".

You could hear a silent chuckle as Callie lifted her head and watched him with a coquettish look. "Only once again, George, please", she begged. "I just want to raise our chances", she explained as she saw his wrinkled forehead.

He silently groaned and resigning threw his arms behind. "Okay, but you need to hurry. I have an important appointment today."

Callie stopped in her movement and thoughtfully looked at her husband: "Did you make a decision? What do you want to do?"

George groped for one of Callie's curls and twisted them between his fingers. "Do I have really a choice?"

Callie shook her head. "You can't quit. Not after you have already come so far."

"I shall start from scratch?" George asked doubtfully.

"You shall do what you regard as right", Callie marked.

"If I only knew what is right…". George planted a kiss onto Callie's cheek and set away his blanket: "So first, I probably should get up, take a quick shower and have breakfast."

Callie nodded: "I call the room-service so that they can bring it upstairs".

With a worried look Callie watched her husband as he entered the bathroom. She quickly made her phone call and snuggled herself again in her blanket. She would stick with him no matter what decision he made. It wasn't an empty promise she gave him. She loved him – honestly and truly, and no one could ever destroy that love.

Callie's thoughts went to Izzie. The glance, that young woman threw at her, after she had told her that from now on the interns will stand under her supervision, had spoken volumes. Callie knew about the eyes, Izzie and George fixed at each other in the dressing-room. During the whole time she had the bad feeling, that Izzie Stevens was hiding something behind her. And her yesterday's reaction certainly confirmed that impression.

Callie's lips pursed in a smile. Of course, that was the point. Izzie was jealous of what she and George had: an intact marriage and the prospect of a baby. Why hadn't already she come onto it earlier? That also explained why Izzie from the beginning met her with hostility and denial. Jealousy and envy – no more and no less. The living motto of Isobel Stevens.

Callie lively got up and slipped out of her nightdress. With a critical look she watched her naked body in the mirror. Okay, maybe she doesn't have model extents but she had something that Izzie didn't have and would never receive: George and sooner or later his baby. Satisfied she grinned at her mirror image and then continued her way to the bathroom, where George was still taking a shower. Callie threw back her long black hair and opened the door of the shower-cabinet.

"Is there still a place available for me?", she asked with a salacious smile and slipped next to George into the cabinet.

**Hospital: **

Already as Meredith entered the dressing room she knew that something was different. Even more changes. She briefly looked at the new faces before she went to her locker. Meredith didn't feel like talking so she only greeted Izzie and Alex with a short nod. She immediately recognized that something was wrong with them but she hadn't enough power for dealing with their problems. Speechlessly she took of her clothes to slip into her clinic-dress. Lightly yawning she brushed up her hair, but some of the streaks came off so that she had to start over again. She was doing this a few times until the voice of Izzie let herself galvanize.

"Meredith, are you coming?" Meredith looked at her nodding. Contentedly with her last attempt to hold the hair from her face, she turned round and ran into a woman, who seemed somehow known to her.

"Oh, sorry. The caffeine doesn't work yet." Distinctly Meredith looked at the face. "Have we met?"

"Meredith?" The young woman considered her with a curious look.

"Ähm, yes?" Nervously she bit her lips.

"Are you Meredith Grey?" She repeated her question. 

"Yes, that's me!" She knew that she already had met that woman. Something seemed known to her. "Say, do we know each other?"

The young woman shook her head. "Not personally". A smile darted over her face while she extended her hand to Meredith. "I am Lexie … Grey. Nice, to meet you. My dad told me that you are working here."

"Oh", nervously Meredith looked at the extended hand. "Nice, to meet you, too." Hesitantly she took the hand of her half-sister. Also, Lexie looked at her friendly, she thought about Thatcher and how he yelled at her in public.

"Do you know Dr. Bailey? I heard she is a real bitch", Lexie jabbered. "I guess they call her a Nazi. I shall get in touch with her, you know, Today is my first day."

"What?" She looked astonished to her half-sister who seemed to be without any fears of contact. "Yeah, I know Dr. Bailey. She is quite okay if one doesn't annoy her." Meredith lightly shook her head and suddenly she blurted out: "Aren't you mad at me? Because of Susan … your mum?" She could have missed herself a slap. "Sorry. I … ähm … I'm sorry for what has happened to you mum. She was nice."

Lexie's smile froze on her lips. "She was friendly, and always cheerfully." she silently answered. "She was always there when Molly and I had any problems. It's not fair, that she had to die. She took the cheeriness and the warmth of the house with her. And dad, since mom died he is ..."She turned her head as she felt ho tears ran down her cheek.

"Oh, I ... I am sorry ... I", she just couldn't deal with that. Something told her, that it would be okay, if she placed a hand on Lexie's shoulders but instead of comforting her she started fidging her coat. "So, you got the nazi?"

Lexie wiped a hand over her cheek and nodded. She lifted her head and looked at Meredith: "I guess, I didn't answer you question yet". She took a deep breath before she continued. "No, I don't blame my mother's dead on you. I am a surgeon; I know that there can be complications in every operation. I tried to explain it to my dad but my mother's dead embittered him in a way I never thought it would. He started ..." Lexie stopped. "I am sorry. I always talk too much when I am nervous."

Astonished Meredith looked at her and started laughing: "It seems that he bequeathed that attribute to both of us, you know the stammering and too much talking.".

Lexie joined the laughing. "I really like you humour. Dad described you way different from how you really are."

Meredith stiffened and felt a lump building in her throat. Clearing she re-established fidging her coat. "Yes, he never thought well about me." She shortly laughed and shook her head. "At least, one thing he had in common with my mother".

Embarrassed Lexie looked on the floor. "I am sorry", she sincerely said. "I didn't want to touch a sore point. Dad told me that you mother recently died. It's got to be hard to be alone. At least, I have dad."

"I was alone for my life." Her thoughts dangled to Derek and the sad look on his face in the church. But she dropped the thought as fast as it came. "You get used to it."

"Maybe we can have a drink ... and talk?" Lexie asked smiling. "I'd like to know more about you. After all, you're my half-sister."

Meredith roughly gulped. Of course, she wanted to say, she just couldn't "I don't know." Sighing she turned away and looked on the side. After a short moment she turned back to her half-sister. "Maybe ... I don't think that this would be a great idea, right now. I have to take care of my best friend and yesterday I ...". She made a short break. "I really don't think that I have time for this. Let us see, when I am through with everything".

"I understand." Lexie nodded. "It seems that the surgeons are really nice". She quickly changed the subject. "I met one ... dark hair ... really sexy." She rolled eyes. "But as usual, at the moment I met him he just was about to go." She shrug shoulders. "By the way, I better sign up for Bailey before she starts a missing person report".

Something about Lexie's description of the surgeon let her arouse and her hackles rose. But she shook of that feeling. Although she didn't occured another surgeon, except Derek, she would describe that way, she was sure, that there were a lot of others in the hospital. She looked at the friendly face of Lexie and tried to smile. "Yeah, Bailey is getting pissed very fast. And to annoy her one you first day really isn't a good idea. So, maybe we see us often".

"Yes, of course. Talking to you was very nice, Meredith". Lexie nodded again before she turned and left the dressing-room.

Really great Meredith thought as she leaned against her locker and closed her eyes. As if she already doesn't have enough problems with Cristina, Derek and drying roommates. Clumsy she squeezed and left the room.

Cristina bobbed behind the nurse station, she didn't want Callie to see her. Bailey already caught her too times and she really didn't want to hold the same conversation again. After Callie had disappeared around the corner she relying respired. With a short look at her watch she recognized that Meredith probably already started her operation. It wasn't disturbing for her that some of the nurses pitying looked at her as she made her way to the gallery. After having arrived there she placed herself in the back row and watched her friend assisting in a craniotomy.

She thought that it was really unfair that they allowed Meredith to work while she herself had to stay at home the rest of the day. After all, during the last weeks Meredith had to deal with more blows of fate than a burst wedding could ever mean to her. Cristina just recognized that someone was sitting next to her as she felt a hand placed on her shoulder.

"She is doing very well down there". Bailey made a gesture to the operating room.

"Yeah, that's what I thought." Christina pressed her lips together, preparing for a third round.

"For me, it seems that you don't have that opinion. Otherwise you wouldn't sit here and root her." Now Bailey paid her whole attention to Cristina who started feeling more uncomfortable, now that some of her colleagues turned to her.

"No, I am only here for watching ... learning." She recognized that her voice wasn't really convincing.

"Learning?"

"Yeah, we are still in a learning hospital and that's why I sit up here. I watch and I learn". Baley lifted an eyebrow, deeply exhaled and shook her head.

"Yang, you shouldn't be here today."

"I am fine, Dr. Bailey". Cristina sighing leaned back and crossed her arms but Bailey's look made her frighten.

"Yang, go home. I don't want to tell you that again and I don't want to see you a second time." With her finger Bailey indicated Cristina the door. Cristina stayed on her seat so that Bailey had to put her fists on her hips and again had to take a deep breath. That was enough for Christina to make her soaring.

"I guess, I will go home". She nodded towards Bailey who was still starring at her.

"Yeah that's what I thought." Cristina shortly looked at the operating room for a last time and then left the gallery as fast as she could. Contently Bailey placed herself on the seat of Christina and again shook her head.

**Operating Room:**

After all the learning for the final exam it was a relief for Meredith to stand in the operating room again. She was tired too, because she had to stand in an unusual posture during the operation and now her forearms hurt. She tried to drain her concurrent musculature as well as she could. Immediately after the operation Callie had assigned her for Derek, who needed the help of an intern for one of his patients. Although she fought tooth and nail to avoid the assigning she couldn't change Callie's mind. So, Meredith tried to find Derek. While she continued her way to the nurse station she rummaged for a biro pen in the bag of her coat. As she finally found it she radiantly lifted her head and her face froze. She saw Derek in Front of her. Leaning against a wall he was flirting with her half-sister. Talking. No, definitely flirting. At least, she was sure that he was talking to every women in that way. She didn't even know when it was the last time that he was talking to her in that way. Everything in her body screamed for running away. But like you act in a train accident she watched how Derek gave a laugh, because Lexie told him something, probably really funny stuff. She looked on her clock and sadly shook her head. It hadn't even been 24 hours since she broke up and he was flirting with her half-sister. Still stunned she watched how Derek and Lexie signed off and how Lexie turned away and went to the elevators. Derek came into her direction. Her muscles instinctively strained and she straightened herself. She was ready, for what he had to say. Her eyes shortly met and Meredith opened her mouth, ready for her answer. But in that moment he already passed her. Stunned Meredith only watched him passing her. Then she saw how the nurses got into a huddle and she knew, that she had to do something. Finally she regained composure and turned to Derek, who already got a short distance between them.

"So, that's it?" Her voice sounded hoarsely because she hadn't drunk for a while. She shortly cleared which made Derek slow down his steps. "You know, that this was my half-sister?"

"Yes." Still walking Derek answered silently.

"Is that a gruel joke that you are flirting with Lexie on the first day?" She simply couldn't deal with that and grabbed Derek's arm so that he had to turn around. With an empty countenance he said: "It wasn't the first time".

"What do you mean?" Stunned she tried to find out what Derek was talking about and finally she knew it. "She is the other woman, isn't she?" Silently Derek nodded. "So, you were flirting with her?" She couldn't finish the sentence. Lexie, of all people. She looked down on the floor as she tried to control her emotions. To burst into tears in the middle of the corridor wasn't a real option.

"Are you finished?" She lifted her head. "I have a lot of work, it seems that Dr. O'Malley doesn't have an intern for me today."

"That would be me". She watched him frowning. She hadn't thought that her first meeting with Derek would be that uncomfortable.

"Okay, I want to have another CT for Mr. Jones, before I operate him in the afternoon. And I don't want you to leave him". Derek turned away and left a blankly looking Meredith who didn't even recognize that someone was standing behind her.

"Okay, what was that?" Cristina watched Derek disappearing around the corner and turned to Meredith who still tried to deal with the situation. "Meredith?" Cristina slowly got impatient and pinched her fried who frightened winced. 

"Are you crazy?". She rubbed her hurting arm. "What the hell are you doing here? Bailey send you home hours ago."

"Yes, but what's the matter?"

"He was flirting with Lexie."

"Talking."

"Flirting. And now he acts like an idiot. That's the matter." Meredith couldn't believe that Cristina took his side. She wasn't predestined fort that. "And you were send home". Angrily she turned around and ran into Bailey who was standing behind her.

"Running away isn't an option. Yang, go home", she snapped while she put her hands in her hips. "Come on!" Frightened by her old boss both tried to escape. Bailey stood ther headshaking and closed her eyes. "One year work for nothing, don't follow orders, aren't self-confident, fail in the exams, can't stop dating their superiors". Sighing she rubbed her nose ridge. Then she continued her way, still mumbling something about nursery school. 

**At the house of Meredith:**

Alex opened the front door and went into his room. He didn't have much time, soon Izzie and Meredith would come home. Until that he wanted to have his things packed. He got his big travelling bag and opened his closet. He needed only a few grips to put his belongings into the bag. Now he only needed his laundry-things. Alex went to the bathroom and almost stumbled over the dressing-gown of Izzie which she had carelessly thrown next to the door-frame He lifted it up and meditatively hold it in his hands for a short moment. There was a sight aroma of her perfume and he had to resist the temptation to press it against his nose. Memories of how he took the night-dress of her back and how they made love under the shower came into his mind. But all that seemed to miles away. Meanwhile Izzie lost her heart to Denny and now she was in Love with George. And what's about him? 

Alex didn't want to think about all that. He dropped the night-dress as if it burned his fingers. He quickly packed his laundry-things and put them into his bag. He had to look forward. After all, it seems that everyone else around him was looking forward. And moving out would be the first step. Everything else was of second rank. Alex left the bathroom and went back to his room. He pulled off the bedding and neatly laid it over the chair. After that he put his key on the bedside-table. It was done. He didn't have any business to be here anymore. Sighing he grabbed for his bag and left the house.

_Surgeons are aware of their diseases in a different way. They recognize the symptoms and the hide them carefully. For some this turns out well, for others less well (Alex is sitting in Joe's Bar regarding Izzie how she watches George and Callie leaving the hospital). But if you don't heal that disease (Cristina takes a look at her wedding-dress) the pain gets worse till you someday can't hide it anymore (Cristina starts crying). On that account surgeons have to be patient (During the operation Derek looks to Meredith), with themselves and their patients. And someday even the most intimidated patient comes to trust (Meredith looks to Derek, their eyes meet). And then, you can even heal a severe illness._

_tbc_


End file.
